Gifts for a Male Caregiver? I got your back.

What’s a good idea to show a male caregiver you care about them?

Tall, dark, and handsome. I’m a 36 year old male caregiver to my dad. I’ve got a few ideas for you.

My first tip? Give them something easy to use. The last thing a family caregiver wants is one more responsibility.

I’m getting soft on you for a moment to recommend, you could show your appreciation through actions. Consistency over time equals trust deserved of few fellow brethren.

Then I’ll show you some stuff to buy for a man who assumes the caregiver role, and you think he’s swell.

1. Housework and Favors A Male Caregiver Would Accept From You

Although a male caregiver may have money on his mind, not every gift you give has to come with a hefty price tag. Frilly, girly, fuzzy, smelly self-care stuff might be a hard bargain for the masculine independent type.

You could do them a favor, send them a dad joke via text message, or call in unannounced just to say “Whassssup”.

Given the slow and progressive nature of aging and the caregiving responsibilities, regular favors over time amount to more than, say, one checkout cart on Amazon. It all helps though.

Get rid of any guilt you’re not doing enough. The big and little things both help, and I’m so grateful for the handful of people in my life who I call my “social support network”. It takes a man in touch with his emotions to say that.

Any practical thing you can do, a sensible man would appreciate.

1. Out-and-back transportation. This has never happened for me, but I secretly wish someone would do this. Out and back. You come to my house, pick up my dad, take him to Wendy’s drive-thru or wherever, and then you bring him back. It’s nice when you come into my home too. But what you’ve done just now is more rare. You’ve given the caregiver the house to themselves for a moment. Peace and quiet, almost like a normal retirement, while you were taking my dad out to Wendy’s or wherever you boys like to hang out.
2. “Surprise home delivery!” Deliver food, drinks, snacks, or gas station fun stuff to the caregiver. You don’t even need to say hi. Ding dong, put the gift there, run!
3. “Just be there.” Call, text, message, mail, or drop by regularly. Just to say hi, or to offer to look after the elderly person in need for a while would be an incredibly helpful act (way above and beyond).
4. “Super neighbor!” It’s the coolest thing when my neighbor Greg (a retired mechanic and food-canning hobbyist) snow blows our sidewalks in the winter, and he’s even mowed when we were out of town one time. I owe you one, Greg! (Other good house chores an angel neighbors could help a caregiver complete include: the gutters twice a year, trimming some bushes or branches, watching they house while they outa town.

2. Electronics & Entertainment for Male Caregivers

2020 research by Bio Med Central shows dementia caregivers want technology that is “easy to install”, “easy to learn”. “not too expensive”, and “just works”.

‍Alexa Echo Dot #ad costs around $50 last time I checked. I got one for my family a few months ago, and bought another Dot and a Show. My Alexa’s are multiplying like tribbles. They’re easy to use and make life more fun with music and more convenient with reminders and more connected with calling.

Smartwatches are all the rage for promoting a healthy lifestyle. All those old commercials for a “Help! I’ve fallen but can’t getup” device no more! Many smartwatches work great for male caregivers and the aging people they care for. To track exercise and activity, as well as being a real phone you can call people with.

If you don’t buy and Apple or Samsung, a smartwatch doesn’t cost too much.

3. Self-Care Gifts Men Will Actually Use

A nice razor is something I won’t buy for myself (to save money), but if someone gave me a multi-blade close-shave. For face stuff, Burt’s Bee’s cooling face wash is the best I’ve ever had.

I tried their shave cream too, but haven’t gotten the hang of it yet. Can’t figure out how much to use.

Anything that a man has to use for daily hygiene, if you get an upgraded version of it, that’s a pretty good gift. Disposable stuff doesn’t put on as much pressure for the person receiving the gift.

I’ve been brushing with the black sludge Colgate Whitening Charcoal Toothpaste. LIVFRESH Whitening costs around $20 per squeeze tube, but I’ve heard it whitens way better.

(You can get LIVFRESH on Amazon, too.)

If I use a tube of toothpaste to brush my teeth 40 times, then it’s just $0.50 per brushing. The spartan economist can agree to paying extra to get the best toothpaste in the world at that price.

When money is tight, I don’t recommend asking a male caregiver to “splurge on themselves”. I mean, don’t use those words to encourage paying more for self-care purposes.

4. Manly Things to Help a Caregiver Get Some Sleep

The bottom line is “self-care” means taking care of yourself. It includes, food, exercise, and sleep.

Self-care has become something of a feminine concept, at least when you hear it on a Facebook ad. Smelly shower gels and fuzzy robes with cucumbers on your eyes.

Even though a man’s man stays away from the frilly stuff, they do self-care too. Like showering. Like napping in the recliner. Like going to the gym is an active form of self-care.

Lounging around in sweatpants, it turns out, is a common way male caregivers do self-care.

You could get them a nice robe. It could be cotton, linen, or flannel. Doesn’t need to be a day spa plush.

A pillow or blanket to sleep refreshed. I’m even thinking about a well-designed eye-cover sleep mask. 

A white noise machine or sleep sounds machine is a nightly habit of mine, which helps me fall to sleep faster.

5. The Quickest Way to a Male Caregiver’s Heart…

…is FOOD of course!

Homemade food is the best of the best. But sometimes greasy Fast Food you haven’t had time to go get in a month or two is the best of the best. Food in man make man happy.

Meaty, cheesy, savory, smokey, juicy, something you can eat with your hands… Just some of the mouth-watering types of food I wish you’d bring over to my house. My dad and me both are looking forward to it!

6. Send A Greeting Card and/or Gift Card

Money’s a sore spot for some caregivers. 

A greeting card (virtual or online-to-offline) brings a smile to anyone’s face especially if it’s not enclosed with any type of obligation for a caregiver who’s up to their gills in Medica-this-and-that’s. I’m using Postable, but thinking about GroupGreeting if I had more friends to make cards with.

I don’t laugh at home as much anymore, since my dad’s not as good at joke anymore. So if you could send me a card that’d make me chuckle, that’d be welcome.

I sent a greeting card to my same-age college buddy after he was fired from his job. He said it was nice to be contacted. He’s not a caregiver, but did you know 50% of caregivers are lonely?

Some online-to-offline greeting care websites let you choose from a variety of gift cards. For men, home improvement store like Home Depot or Lowe’s or Ace would work well.

What man doesn’t have a favorite restaurant, or one in the area that he’s eaten at before. A gift card compels the thrifty, self-reliant male caregiver to get downtown to get the thing you know they like.

Prepaid cards like the Visa Gift Card are just like a credit card you can use “Everywhere You Want To Be” until the amount runs out.

Don’t make your gift look like a charity case, that’d be highly offensive. But if your read of the relationship is giving a credit card type generic gift card to a friend is cool, then go for it bro.

UPDATE October 3, 2023 - This post contained a screenshot from a third party website, but this screenshot is now removed to better comply with webmaster best practice.